As If The Day Wouldn't Be Hard Enough
by So then this happened
Summary: Ianto's POV during Something Borrowed. Just what I think might have been going on in his and Jack's minds. not really much substance here. Spoilers if you haven't seen the episode.


As if Gwen's wedding day wasn't going to be trouble enough with just plain ordinary wedding problems. Owen was testy with anything concerning delays in the wedding, almost as though Gwen's special day meant more to him than it did to Gwen, almost. Tosh was still annoyed about the bridesmaid issue but feelings of loneliness quickly superseded them, she was upset that Owen wasn't going to be going to the wedding. Jack was a right mess, he didn't like knowing Gwen was entering into a monogamous lifetime commitment; growing up in the 51st century with different views and categories-or rather a lack thereof- meant that even after living on earth for so long he still couldn't wrap his head around marrying only one person, even if he had done it in the past. Ianto found himself annoyed at everyone. Owen couldn't handle the thought of something going wrong before she got married which was sweet. However, he had declined the invitation to attend which was understandable if you knew Owen's past, but poor Gwen didn't. All she knew was that someone she cared about was refusing to come to her wedding and wouldn't say why. Tosh was a sweet person but Ianto wished she would show some confidence in herself when it came to asking Owen out. Sure she had attempted to in the past but she never made herself clear. If she would apply some of that brilliance with technology that she had in abundance to her lack of a relationship with Owen, he was sure it would work out. And then there was Jack. The Captain had unspoken feelings toward Gwen and Ianto wasn't sure what was worse, the fact that Gwen reciprocated those feelings or how they pretended it didn't exist. Jack had replied to the invitation in the positive but had told Ianto he would be missing the wedding due to a rift alert that would be perfectly timed. Jack's actual plans for the evening of the wedding included taking Owen out to a bar and helping the young physician work through some of his tougher feelings. _A noble cause_ he thought. Ianto was far too polite to turn down a wedding invitation and besides, he was happy for Gwen to be getting the chance to be a married Torchwood operative. Life was far too short especially in their line of work to wait to be married. He hoped she would get pregnant and that Jack would convince her to retire to raise her child in some relative safety. A married Torchwood operative with a family who retired from active duty, it had a nice ring to it and gave Ianto hope. He might not be good with children but he loved them regardless. Tosh and he were to go as each other's dates and he was hoping her comment about making Owen jealous by taking some wild photos at the reception were sincere. The grumpy physician needed a wake up call. And if Jack found the photos interesting all the better. He was sure he could tease the hell out of Jack for weeks following the wedding by eluding to what happened between him and Tosh that the cameras did not capture. Always followed by a wink, naturally.

Annoyances toward his colleagues aside, he was looking forward to a night off from work. Even if it meant a long drive, a boring ceremony, and a painful wait for the reception to begin, once the bar was opened he planned on drinking with tosh until he got her to open up and have some fun. Oh, and the cheesy wedding music was going to be fun in it's own terrible way he was sure.

But this was Torchwood. Like he said before, as if Gwen's wedding wouldn't be trying enough with the emotional issues at hand, the universe had to throw a gigantic monkey wrench into things by way of exo-biological insemination; getting Gwen pregnant, through a bite. Ianto snickered at the thought, _brings whole new meaning to love bite_. He thought sadly about how all the bites he leaves on Jack heal too quickly for his liking.

Things started to go downhill when Jack sent him on that mission for the dress. At first he was shocked that Jack turned to him after sending Tosh to go home and get ready for the wedding early but not him. He wondered what in the world Jack was going to ask him to do, he was still reeling from finding out Gwen was going to go through with the wedding after all and Jack and Owen weren't trying harder to talk her out of it. When Jack told Ianto to buy a new dress for Gwen he was glad. It was a normal task to do, well, normal for Torchwood at least. Actually, no. There was nothing normal about it, but at least he wasn't being told to dump a body in a river somewhere, or picking up a large order of kelp, or having to clean up after a rogue weevil. It was nice task, simple, and truth be told a bit too easy for him. His even demeanor was smashed when he arrived at the dress shop.

"Of course you are, sir. You'd be surprised, we're quite used to men

buying for their ... 'friends'."

_What the hell was that? _ Ianto immediately began to feel antsy and uncomfortable. Was it obvious? Did he have "I'm shagging a bloke" written across his forehead? If he hadn't been...dabbling, with Jack he would still have been sent on this mission, would the shop assistant still have made that comment? Could people tell he was no longer entirely straight just by looking at him? Growling slightly he pushed the thoughts out of his and focused on the task at hand.

Upon arriving back at the hub and handing over the wrapped dress to a very beautiful Toshiko, Ianto's thoughts about the shop assistant's comments were forgotten.

"Toshiko, you look lovely." he complemented his coworker. She did indeed look quite wonderful and he told himself he shouldn't allow himself to get too drunk at the wedding, aside from wanting to be alert in case something went wrong with the alien egg inside of Gwen, he also wanted to make sure he didn't make a drunken pass at his 'date'. It would be highly inappropriate, but all sorts of things happened at weddings.

"Oh Ianto, I have good news." She bubbled at him trying to keep her voice down. He leaned in indulgently as she smiled and continued in a whisper "Owen said he's going to come to the wedding after all."

"That's great Tosh." Ianto replied sincerely, albeit a bit disappointed. Still, open bar, at least he had that going for him. Although...an idea popped into head that maybe he could convince Jack to spend the evening with him. Owen could take Ianto's place as Tosh's date and Ianto could take Owen's place as Jack's distraction. He smiled again at Tosh who was now beaming at him and headed over to make some coffee before talking to Jack about the dress, and about tonight. A night out at the clubs with Jack sounded nice. His footing caught and Ianto found himself thinking instead that a night in would be preferred as the shop assistant's words came back to him. He vaguely recalled hearing Tosh letting Jack know that she was on her way out and would be in contact. Carrying the coffees over to Jack's office he passed by the cog wheel door and caught a glimpse of Tosh's shoes as she hurried out of the hub. As he closed in on Jack's office he heard the Captain's conversation with Gwen. One side of the conversation anyway.

"Hey. How are you doing?"

"Look, I just wanted to let you know Tosh will be with you anytime.

Call it moral support."

"Yeah, I hear you, Rhys. Look, still, congratulations ..."

Jack looked at his phone sadly before he closed it.

_Time for a distraction. For both of us_. Ianto thought as he handed Jack a mug and began to sip from his own. After a moment or two of silence, when Jack had sat down behind his desk and Ianto sat on the edge of it, he pulled out the booklet from the dress shop and gave a small smile. "Want to see which one I got?"

Jack brightened at that and replied with a cheery "Yes".

Ianto turned around to look over Jack's shoulder as the older man perused the pamphlet. They each made a comment about each dress in the booklet. Ianto was smiling inwardly at the simple activity and letting go of his insecurity about the comment made to him at the shop.

"No, I like that one. Good choice."

"I estimated Gwen's size from the hub security laser scans." Ianto thought that if he wanted to reel Jack in to a night of innovative dabbling he better start flirting. "As you know, my dad was a master tailor. He could size a man's inside leg measurement by his stride across the shop threshold."_ My father?! Why did I just mention that? Well, maybe Jack could help me work through some of those issues too, just not tonight. _Ianto waited for Jack to respond more nervously than normal.

"Ah, the family eye. Remind me to test it some time."

_Perfect. Come on Jones, he won't turn you down. Just say that maybe later on after the wedding you could both test it, and when he comments about having to wait so long, offer to stay behind and miss the wedding. We'll have the hub all to ourselves for hours, during the day, a rarity indeed._ Ianto realized he was thinking more than speaking and blustered out, "Well, if ... uh ... later on ..."

"Jack." Owen burst in to the room and suddenly his insecurity about mixing his personal life with Jack and his professional one with his boss came crashing back, aided by the shop assistant's comments coming back in his head.

"Yeah, brilliant, like that one." Ianto awkwardly tried to overcompensate. He noticed the hurt and confused look on Jack's face and didn't do anything about it.

"We've got a problem." Owen informed them and Ianto winced as he repeated the last moments in his head like a horror film.

After finding out what the problem was, a Nostrovite, and being filled in on what exactly that means; the entire wedding is at risk of getting torn to shreds by an alien looking for it's baby, they headed out. Ianto and Jack entered into a well rehearsed ballet of movements around each other as Ianto handed him his gun and helped him on with his coat. Walking out of Jack's office Ianto took a moment to appreciate Jack in that coat. _I really like that coat_. He thought. He started feeling better about himself, about Jack.

Then the conversation about weddings began and Ianto realized why he was feeling the way he did. Because he felt that Jack would rather displace his odd feeling about Gwen getting married than talk to him about it. He always does this. He always shuts him out.

"What I don't understand is, if people are going to make such a big deal about getting married, why come all the way out into the middle of nowhere, where no one can find you, to do it? That, to me, suggests inner conflict." Jack ranted a bit out of nowhere. Ianto knew it was because Jack couldn't be comfortable marrying one individual and living a monogamous life, and since he cared deeply for Gwen he didn't want to see her trapped in such a confining category.

He knew that, and yet he still answered shortly, "It's because the happy couple want everything to be perfect." Ianto and Jack had talked about adding someone in to the mix and that conversation had gone well, but Ianto couldn't help feel like Jack was hiding more about his feelings towards Gwen.

At the wedding, Jack went barreling in to stop everything. Just like in the movies. _Oh I bet he loved every second of that_, Ianto thought. His concern for Tosh took his focus and when he saw the state she was in after tracking her down, he wished he had gone straight to the wedding with her and not stayed behind at the hub doing nothing of importance. He had to get her out of that tar like mess and off of that yellowy man she seemed stuck against. Then that girl came in and started screaming. Ianto froze, for a moment the scream sounded like the terrors at Canary Wharf. Jack's command to follow her and contain the situation grounded him again and he went running off.

Then the shit started flying.

Eventually they were able to save the day, although the alien and her child were dead now instead of contained. It was sad really. Ianto volunteered to take over for the murdered DJ and after all the traditional dances and events took place, when it was time for just dancing for the remainder of the night Ianto allowed himself to ponder the day's events.

He queued up Paul Weller's "You Do Something To Me" and watched the room as it began to play. Owen finally got Tosh out on the dance floor. It was sweet. Owen tried so hard to block out all his feelings about weddings but here he was, dancing with someone he cared about at one of the craziest weddings Ianto had ever heard about let alone be witness to. He looked over and saw Jack had cut in to dance with Gwen. Ianto replayed his actions during the day in his head and realized he was being a right prat about it. No, he didn't have a sign saying he was shagging a bloke across his forehead, he was just a decent looking young man who held a dress up to himself in front of a mirror. Seriously idiotic to think he was shocked at the comment. Then there was his ignoring Jack's feelings all day. Ianto knew ahead of time how Jack felt about weddings, he knew how Jack felt about Gwen, he knew how hard today had been thinking that the worst might have happened on what was supposed to be Gwen's perfect day. He knew that Jack had looked hurt at Ianto's reaction to Owen walking in on them doing nothing but talking in his office. He knew all of this and yet he still behaved like a total wanker. He needed to apologize, but how? Words weren't everything to Jack. Time to queue up a few more songs.

The day had been long and hard on Jack. _Weddings_ he scoffed. There was a time in his past when it seemed like a good idea. He had wanted it too, even if here on Earth it was more confining than what he was used to. But after all this time, seeing what being immortal had done to his past relationships, seeing what the job at Torchwood had done to his mortal friends, he couldn't justify it. Not for himself. Not anymore. Misery loves company, so yes, a small part of him was hoping Gwen wouldn't get married after all. He cared about her. He wanted to show her how he felt, but in this society you couldn't go around sleeping with people just to show them you cared. That social mentality doesn't start for a long time yet. Tosh was asked to dance by Owen, finally. That left Jack at the table. Alone. He decided to ask Rhys if he could dance with Gwen. Better to be polite about it.

There was so much he wanted to tell Gwen as they danced. He settled for small talk. She looked absolutely beautiful. She was amazing. All this craziness around her and she was making her love life work. She was so stubborn. Nothing stood in her way today and Jack felt scared for a moment if he ever had to really stop Gwen from doing something. Rhys really was a lucky man. Jack made a joke about doing Ianto while Gwen was off on her honeymoon and it reminded him of his young lover's attitude towards him today. He thought briefly that the night was not going to end the way he had originally hoped it would. He had hoped Ianto would come back from the wedding with sarcastic comments and witty observations, tired from all he dancing, and maybe even have some incriminating photos to share. However Ianto seemed distant and awkward today. _He was fine until I sent him off to get the dress. _Frustrated with the young man already and his heart heavy with memories of being a groom looking at his bride, he looked at Gwen now with longing. He wanted simple. He wanted a life with someone where "till death do us part" didn't mean Jack staying alive for all of eternity. He really would miss the spit-fire that was Gwen. Rhys was a strong man, a deserving man.

Ianto cut in and immediately Jack knew he was intending on dancing with him and not with Gwen, though the look on her face was rather priceless. Jack didn't understand. Ianto didn't have anything to worry about, so why was he cutting in? _Trying to stake his claim?_ No, that wasn't like Ianto at all. It was just because they were at wedding. Weddings made people sappy and romantic. Jack felt a bit bitter and it probably showed. As the next song began to play Jack's heart was not in it and he really wanted to go sit down and contemplate how much he had never wanted to be at a wedding again, _And Ianto should know this about me_. He thought sadly. _He's been acting like he wanted nothing to do with me and here he is dancing with me in front of all these people- Oh!_ It finally hit Jack. Ianto was apologizing. Dancing in front of complete strangers, in front of their co-workers, was Ianto's way of saying he was sorry for being distant. Dancing AND letting Jack lead. Jack smiled as he realized Ianto was telling him it was ok if their co-workers knew because that silly little category of being boss and employee didn't matter to him any longer. He finally loosened up and enjoyed the rest of the song and dance with his young Welshman. When the song was over Jack waited for Ianto to make the first move and sure enough, he was kissed before being escorted back to his table. Ianto went back to the DJ equipment and when he looked up again at Jack, the older man had a grin on his face, a waitress walked over to Ianto and delivered a beer which he didn't order. He looked at Jack and saw him nod. Ianto winked at him and took a long swig.

After asking some wait staff to run the DJ booth and a quick lesson on how to run it, Ianto went over to get Rhys a drink and join his co-workers and the happy couple at a table.

Jack was feeling much better about this whole being-at-a-wedding-thing since Ianto had whispered some pretty erotic ideas in his ear when he helped deliver the Retcon to the guests, so Jack's attitude became a bit sassy.

Once the clean up operation was complete it was well into the next morning. Ianto and Tosh were dead on their feet. Owen and Jack still had energy to spare though. Owen took Tosh home and Jack drove Ianto back to the hub. The younger man fell asleep on the way there and Jack smiled. He cared about the young man. He really did. Maybe it was time to share a bit more of his past with him. When they arrived back at the hub, Ianto insisted on going out for coffee as he was too knackered to make any himself and still did not like the way Jack handled his coffee machine. So Jack was left to walk into the hub alone. He blew out some confetti left over from the wedding and went to his desk. Taking out the box with his old pictures he remembered taking the files Torchwood kept on him when he took over from Alex. He had burned them all, but he kept the photos they had taken of him over the years attached to the files and placed them away in this old box along with a few other photos. He came across the photo from his wedding and became lost in remembrance.

When Ianto returned with four coffees Jack chuckled. Ianto placed one in front of him and took one for himself before sitting down in the chair opposite Jack's desk.

"Ianto?"

"Jack?"

Jack placed the photo in front of Ianto and watched his reaction. Ianto looked at the picture with a tired but inquisitive face.

"I want to tell you about that day" Jack began and Ianto smiled at him.

Ianto loved hearing Jack talk about his past, about himself, about anything. As tired as he was he was overjoyed to be settling in to hear Jack open up. A wave of relief passed through him and he visibly sank into the chair further.

"Glad I went for coffee then" Ianto replied, holding in his excitement.

The two men sat and talked for hours together. Ianto asking questions, and Jack answering in great detail. They both sighed inwardly at their contentment and looked forward to a long rest in each other's arms come night.


End file.
